It Took Less Than Ten Minutes For Me To Become A Pretentious Asshat

I was eating underground
Root vegetables
Organic produce abound
Producing nothing of substance
Sustenance

The irony is not organic and
It's lost on me
That culture
It's not where I want to be

They gave me a map
It told me where to find all the locally sourced narcissism
Places producing sustainable self concern under a guise of anti consumerism

The irony is not organic and
It's lost on me

I was drinking underground
Bought me some friends for the price of an Ethiopian slow drip
Was trying to filter out the bitter,
But realized it would be tossed like litter
Out the window by these tragically hip

Are they the "bitter"?
Am I the bidder?
Biding my time placing bets on the better
I'll lose on these folks
Eat the cost of the loss

After my fill of wining and dining
I'd decided not to buy it
Root vegetables
It matters who supplies it